off to the mekong: diaries of the supposedly seasoned travelers
January 18, Chiang Mai Thailand.
Pulling an almost 007 stunt to finish my work early so that I can rush to Changi airport was not fun at all, it made me feel so giddy and nauseated at the end of the day. I was restraining myself from throwing-up on to the face of my new colleague who was giving me tips on traveling since she found out that I was going on a trip. I tried flashing a big smile and be polite “Thank you very much, I really appreciate the tips.”
It was an all last minute gig: I packed my bag before heading-off to my 9-5 work shift preceding my flight to Chiang Mai; I booked the flights few days before the trip which made me want to utter strings of profanities while I was clicking the payment button on the airline’s website, the fare prices convinced me to pimp Monette to some old-fat-caucasian-perverts to recover the damage; On my way to the airport, I messaged my dad that I will be traveling across Thailand and Laos so expect my online responses to be a bit delayed. He replied with an encouraging line “Okay… Hey, how can I rotate my picture on Facebook?”
I arrived in Chiang Mai past midnight. My co-passengers started bringing-out layers and layers of clothing while we queued-up at the immigration line. I gave everyone an effortless Hugh Laurie WTF look.
I chuckled, “Please… We are in Southeast Asia”
Hurrying to get to the hostel early as I can to finally grab a proper meal, I charged towards the exit like zero fcuks were given to everyone else who opted to stay inside the airport. The door at the arrival hall swung open and the cold air hit me like an invisible wall of ice.
It was like 9°C outside.
With only bermudas, beer shirts and singlet in my backpack, I know I was in deep shit and I should better hit the mall first thing in the morning or I will accidentally poke someone with my pair of perky chiquitas.
Moral of the story: Check the weather forecast…
January 19, Pai Thailand.
I shouldn’t be allowed to write an itemized guide… Why? Because my capacity to perform basic math and make sound decisions are compromised with insane amounts of alcohol. And what’s a good vacation without alcohol, especially when you are on Khao San Road.
Having arrived in Bankok at past midnight, it did not make any sense to get a hotel when there are bars open at Khao San in the wee hours of the morning. So, as fate put it, the awesome pair of WhereThe Travels was also in the hood at the time I got there and we decided to go on a druken spree before I headed out to my next destination. But before planting my exhausted butt somewhere, I did what no traveler should do… I booked a train ticket to Chiang Mai from a travel agency and paid a whopping 1,000THB for a one-way ticket.
And then I let the beer happen…
I do not remember how many bottles I had but I am quite sure I was too drunk to be able to allow myself to get a 350THB-room to stay in for a two-hour stay. At 5AM, I was in high heaven and the WhereThe duo walked me to my bunker.
As the hours passed, a loud thumping aggrevated the pounding on my head. I got off the bed and answered the door with the face-slapping, “Why? What is it?” The timid hotel staff answered, “I though you said you were supposed to catch the 8AM train this morning?” To which I asked, “Why? What time is it?” She dumped an ice-cold, “8AM.”
SHUT THE FRONT DOOR!
I got dressed and hailed a cab to the Hua Lamphong Railway Station. Knowing the train has left, I asked a booking agent for options. She led me to an office on the second floor where a guy booked me a bus ticket instead. I coughed another 900THB, a package for a cab ride to Mo Chit Bus Station and my bus ticket to Chiang Mai.
It is worth to note that I did not check the actual prices of the train ride and the bus ticket when I got to Hua Lamphong and Mo Chit Stations. I swear, certain travel agencies may not be operating today.
Moral of the story: Don’t drink and do math…